You Scream, Rant But Nobody Acknowledges You, Really- Why?

Imagine you have had a great insight, an excellent idea, or a brilliant solution to a problem - and you say it out loud. Then you go out and realise that nobody has heard you. You repeat it loudly, but still nobody hears you - and then one day down the line they realise what you have been saying all along. But nobody acknowledges that you had the idea first, and you are bitter about it, so next time it happens, you start screaming from the beginning or start telling people that you came up with the idea first to get their attention.

When you read this, what comes to your mind first?

First option, maybe others are not ready to listen to you. Some people are ahead of their time; they are quick thinkers - system thinkers, and it takes some people a while to get to where you are. So, you should focus on bringing them along.

Second option, this is how some people are - they never acknowledge or give credit when it is due, especially if you are a female. I mean, all of us have stories of how a woman says something, and nobody hears it, but a man repeats the same thing, and it becomes a fantastic idea.

Third option, maybe you are speaking another language. You need to talk in a language others will understand.

There are many ways to respond - the second one gets me all worked up. Even as I write this, I am so angry at the world. I get so bitter and angry about the world not recognising the greatness right in front of them, and, simultaneously, feel guilty for thinking I am special - my ego has a hate-and-love relationship with being special.

The situation that I mentioned happens to me at work - I got into a team or an organisation, and it was very clear to me what was not working. Even though I told others what the problem was, they didn’t hear me until it became apparent to them. In the meantime, I am just boiling in impatience, tapping my fingers, waiting for somebody to tell me - yes, Anu, we heard you. The need to be acknowledged or being told that I was right seems to be bubbling up recently. And in my reflective moments like this, I wonder what lesson it holds for me. One thing is clear: I do not want the bitterness and anger to fester. My usual way to approach these things is to turn inwards - So, am I acknowledging myself? Do I tell myself that I am right? Or, do I need others to tell me I am right - and even if they do that, I don’t believe them because I have not had the conversation with me.

There is another option - which is that maybe I am not the right fit. The culture, the values and the calibre of people might not be what I like to hang out with, especially as this is the first time this has happened - if this has happened often, then I can look for a pattern or a lesson to learn. In this case, the lesson might be that I am in the wrong place. You can only make a difference by striking when the iron is hot. But if you have different boiling temperatures, then it might not work.

The most important thing is inner peace - nothing is worth losing the harmony and the way there is inwards, 100 per cent within me, not external me. It is up to me to pick the reality that works for me instead of the default reality that might not always work for me - at the end of the day, I choose which wolf I feed.

Do you feel unheard? If so, is it by you, or are you speaking a different language?