How To Watch What Comes Out Of My Mouth?

Chatterbox—that is how people would describe me when I was a kid. Apparently, I drooled a lot as a baby, which was a sign that I would talk a lot—and it is true. As a kid, I never stopped talking to people. As an adult, I learnt to behave in public and be myself in private. This means my close circle of family and friends gets to listen to my nonstop broadcast.

As some of you know, I have been practising Vipassana meditation for quite some time now. One of the commitments you make when you join the 10-day course is to stay silent for nine days. One reason is that it helps the students keep the precept of not telling lies. If you cannot speak, how can you tell lies, at least at the vocal level? Whenever I took the course, I wondered how often I said white lies or fudged something so lightly.

As I was working on my goals for 2025 - what arose in me was to watch what I say or even think in some cases. A few minutes ago, I got a notification from this substack (3) Word(s) Cou—- by Kelly DiNar—- The Sunday Stretch asking about my word for the year. Now, there are no coincidences, as per Kung-fu Panda, so when the time came to pick a topic for my blog, I guess it was. Words! The reason behind choosing words as the focus for 2025 is the Diamond Cutter book by Roach. I read this book a long time ago, and it did have a profound impact on me. And now, my husband is reading it - so it called out to me, and that came to me as my 2025 goal. Thank you - to one and all.

One of the things I want to watch out for this year is taking joy in the woes of the people I dislike or sometimes even wishing problems for them. Yes, I have said it here. Even though, at an intellectual level, I know it is not the right thing to do, I do smile with a bit of glee when the people who are not friendly to me have issues or troubles. Does that make me a bad person? Maybe, but I do know that it makes me human in progress. Even when I wrote this down, my heart fluttered when I thought of the above examples. The issue here is that emotion runs faster than words before I know I have already enjoyed their grief/troubles.

Second, I am a chatterbox. When I am in that talkative mood, sometimes I exaggerate or suppress small details, which count as lies. Sometimes, it may involve speculation about other people or their work, which is gossip. Gossip means talking about somebody who is not there in a negative light. This one is tough, as when I get into that zone of speaking, I switch into an ignorant mood, and awareness strikes only later.

Lastly, I want to pay more attention to ensure that my words do not hurt people around me—intentionally or unintentionally, to the best of my knowledge.

Now, I know that the above is easier said than done, but I have got to start building the mental strength to resist the urge to blurt words. My answer to all such things is awareness, so every day, I will strive to be aware of such examples without judgment. And awareness is just like light—when light comes, darkness goes away—you do not have to do anything.

What is your focus for 2025? And if you have any tips on how to keep my mouth from running out of control - please share :)